Little Tony

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Main4ce
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Little Tony

Post by Main4ce »

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence

and youshoot one of them, how many will be left?" She calls on little TONY.

He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot."

The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking."

Then little TONY says, "I have a question for YOU.

There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:

One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream.

The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.

The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.

Which one is married?"

The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "Well, I suppose the one that's

gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."

To which Little TONY replied, "The correct answer is 'the one with the

wedding ring on," but I like your thinking."


LITTLE TONY ON MATH

Little TONY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.

"Why?" asks the father?

"The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3,'" I said "6", replies TONY.

"But that's right!" says his dad.

"Yeah, but then she asked me "How much is 3x2?'"

"What's the fucking difference?" asks the father.

"That's what I said!"



LITTLE TONY ON ENGLISH

Little TONY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to

learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?"

TONY says "Mas-tur-bate."

Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little TONY, that's a mouthful."

Little TONY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."



LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR

Little TON Y was sitting in class one day.

All of a sudden, he needed to go to the bathroom.

He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!"

The teacher replied, 'Now, TONY, that is NOT the proper word to use in this situation.

The correct word you want to use is 'urinate.'

Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go."

Little TONY, thinks for a bit, and then says, "You're an eight, but

If you had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!"



LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR

One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of

hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.

First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father

bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."

"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.

"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully."

She said, "Excellent, Michael!" Then the teacher reluctantly called on little TONY.

"Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said 'Beautiful, just fucking beautiful!'"



LITTLE TONY ON GETTING OLDER (my Fav) :lol:


Little TONY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another.

After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said,

"Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."

Little TONY replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."

The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"

Little TONY answered, "No, he minded his own fucking business


:finga:
Main4ce
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RAF 617 Squadron "The DamBusters"

Moto: "After me the flood"

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Kizmet
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Post by Kizmet »

Damn,

These are even better than the Little Johnny jokes when I was young.
Kizmet
Executive Officer
RAF 617 Squadron, The DamBusters
AHC COS Retired
AHC CinC Staff, Retired
BEF CinC, Retired
RAF CO, Retired


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Apres Moi Le Deluge!
After me, the flood!

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"The DamBusters - not just a squad, a game imbalance"
gators1 wrote:I think a battalion of Georgia rednecks can easily take a bunch of Vermont hippies with peace symbols on their uniforms.
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AeroCmdr
Posts: 48
Joined: Mon May 17, 2004 10:17 pm

Post by AeroCmdr »

LOL!
AeroCmdr
Pilot Officer
RAF 617 The DamBusters
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